Red Barn Troll Abroad

When I have phone mail, my landline starts flashing a blue light. Obnoxious as it is, it's the only way for me to notice it. Unfortunately, several times over the past months, the blue flashing has meant I missed H.P.'s call *again*. It seemed like a neverending game of phone tag, except that I was never "it". 'Tis true, I'm terrible at returning calls. And H.P. was getting increasingly used to talking to a machine...

Well. What was I going to do? The obvious answer would be, start calling him back. But the obvious path is not nearly as much fun as the unexpected one: I decided to go visit him. Lorenz has been skipping off to Germany so frequently, there must be something good to be found there. So, time to launch the Stuttgart Edition of the Red Barn Troll. Never let it be said that I'm not a superb snoop: if I spy on a farm, I spy on the farmer, and now, it seems I spy on the farmer's extended family as well.

This is the part where you get envious, because I can assure you, last Thursday night, I had more fun than you did. Trust me on that one. In September, I hung out with Til - who, if you will remember, is Lorenz's older brother. I had big fun, and not just because Til was such a good tractor picture model. So, I wanted to see Til, and finally meet the famous Gia: after all, H.P. sings his sister's praises, Lorenz think she's the coolest thing ever, and Til said all kinds of wonderful things about his wife. I felt left out! She was the only one of the clan that I had never even been casually introduced to. You know what? She's as cool as they say.

And hey, while I was at it, I also got to make the acquaintance of H.P. and Gia's mother, and Til and Gia's sons, Karl and Falk. And no, I don't think it's at all weird that I go out for dinner with what amounts to a large chunk of my landlord's extended family. Nor did I think it odd that I spent the night at Til and Gia's when I have family of my own in Stuttgart. But then, I'm the same girl who thinks it's perfectly normal to take pictures of the warning on cigarette packages. If by now you're concluding that it was a late night and there were items that you get good deals on in duty free stores involved, you'd probably be right.

What I do, however, find strange (and unexpected) is how truly nice the Eppinger clan is to Lorenz's barn trolling tenant. Lorenz's mother took us all out for dinner, and then, when it was already quite late, we trooped into the Eppinger senior house to chat with Lorenz's father (who was, at the time, busy researching trees for his private park of a backyard). At this time, I also met a particularly important member of the family: Boris, version 12 or so. See, the Eppinger dogs are all named Boris, so the Greenfields ball of fur actually is part of a bigger tradition. I guess it's much like hiring only Taras and Simons: you never have to bother learning a new name!

Now, spying mission accomplished, I have one small problem: I want to go back! But, alas, I am here in a rainy Tuesday. Though you don't need to feel sorry for me: I'm still as spoiled as ever. There's a German expression, "von nichts kommt nichts" - and perhaps an idiomatic translation is "like family, like son". Last night, I plunked myself down at the kitchen table and ate lasagna courtesy of Lorenz. I even made a token protest when he opened a bottle of wine, saying it wasn't really worth it - but that's when he invited me for dinner again tonight. It's Malcolm's birthday soon, and there is a birthday dinner, which means I better get back to actually working so I can get enough done so I can skip out of here in time to go pick up the cake and spy some more.

Posted by Johanna at February 8, 2005 09:46 AM